I manage to eradicate you from my phone. It was hard, but my Cindy helped me.
She started by blocking your number, please don’t take it personally, it’s for my own stability.
Then she deleted it, and all of our whatsapp conversations. She went into the archives too, I checked, but she managed to take them all away. I had some poems that you wrote to me that I wanted to read again, and some drunk audios that I wanted to revisit one last time. You always loved singing when you’d been drinking, and honestly, it was always amazing. You’d make me laugh and cry in the same verse; you’d also make me wish I was there, and happy to be miles away. Pure magic, you.
I deleted the pictures. It took a lot of time, and a lot of crying, and laughing. We really do take pictures of only the good (and the mundane). But it was a catharsis. With every picture I deleted, I felt like a stone embedded on the cliff I was hanging from, would come loose and drop. It was terrifying, and yet, relieving.
It all went to shits the moment I permanently deleted them. Well, Cindy did it. And I shouted at her! I was so mad!! But she just hugged me, and you know… Free falling once the cliff had crumbled, was pure bliss. So many possibilities opened up in mid air.
Five years down the line, and you’re completely out of my life, and memory. Until today.
It had been years I couldn’t remember your face, or your smile… Or even the sound of your voice.
Someone was wearing the same sandal perfume, and used the same coconut oil moisturizer that I would always tease you with for being so bloody expensive. They smelled of you, and the naive last goodbye.
You were there as much as I know it to be impossible, and five years of my life just disappeared -I was in our last embrace, before you boarded that fucking plane…
Nothing can stop a memory that belongs to a scent.