I Rather Not See You

Well, this didn’t turn out how I expected. She was supposed to stay on the other side of the screen. It’s safer (for me). I’m pretty skilled at replying to her wit (when I have time to think) but come face to face she’ll see how I incessantly bite the inside of my gums, and that I have sweaty palms, and that I take forever to reply to anything she says!

No no… It’s a complete intrusion on her part. I rather be on the dark side of the moon than with her in a room. Don’t get me wrong, I think she’s the right kind of great and I want nothing more than to go on this date. I wish I was that kind of brave, to walk up to a girl and just say “hey”. It’s just not me. I’m good behind a screen. I’m scared she’ll just see me and leave. I’m not sure you know what I mean.

It’s a known fact that guys like me can’t get with girls. I’m tired of being placed in a space where we can only grow as friends. I’ll take it, like a prize for second place. Anything is better than silence, and I’m scared that if I tell her how I feel she’ll just disappear, I’ll be accompanied by her absence. It wouldn’t be the first time, I just wish that for once it would go the other way; it would be nice to know what it’s like to feel wanted and not needed.

I didn’t catfish her, not on purpose anyway. She replied to a comment on the blog that I help run and from there we were off with a bang; every night a text, every morning a poem. Blissfully happy knowing I had somewhere to rest my heart, safe and impossible to reach, I never thought of the day she would want to actually meet!

But she decided that the first trip she would do after the quarantine was to come and see me. I wish I could tell her I’m diseased, but if she can travel, it’s cause she’s got the antibodies… So this wouldn’t serve me.

I guess I just have to be brave and bold, let her know I’ve passed away. This should hold her at bay.

Sometimes the cure is far worse than the disease. (Not the case with Covid-19!)



Discover prompt – Bite




3 thoughts on “I Rather Not See You

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